Victory!! For the Poms at least.

Once again, The Ashes were saved from taking another trip Down Under by a spectacular century from none other than ex-South African Jonathan Trott, proving once again that the best thing in the English cricket team is the South African... or should I say South Africans?

England used 4 of them to great effect in this round of The Ashes:

Andrew Strauss (Johannesburg, 1977)
Kevin Pietersen (Pietermaritzburg, 1980)
Jonathan Trott (Cape Town, 1981)
Matt Prior (Johannesburg, 1982)

In the five Tests played, the Pom batsmen made a total of 2,608 runs, of which 1048 were scored by South Africans. That's a whopping 40.18% of the runs.

Wow.

I'll work out some more stats later, but first I need to do some research on the games and do some calculations and things.

But anyway, well done to the Poms for giving the Aussies carrots. They comprehensively and savagely thrashed them 2-1. Australia will look at this series and realise that it was mostly the lack of wickets that cost them. Only taking twenty English wickets in a match once, compared to England having done that twice, which also happens to be what the score was.

Therefore, to win a Test match, I have narrowed it down to these most important points:

1: Make more runs than your opposition - you can't lose if they're behind you (See point 2 and 3).
2: Take 20 wickets - your opposition can't score more runs than you if they're not batting (see point 1 and 3).
3: Don't concede unnecessary runs (See point 1 and 2).


There has never been a series like this where such a large percentage of the world was against the Aussies. Even the entire population of China was against them, which already makes up 80% of the world's population.

Now that England have done the world a favour by making South Africa the number one ranked Test team in the world (although, if you asked me, I'd tell you that we did it all on our own).

However, I'm looking forward to when the South African B side tours South Africa at the end of the year. Should be a cracker of a tour. South Africans have shown that they enjoy kicking the top ranked teams off their spots, so lets see if we'll be able to kick ourselves off the top. Perhaps Jacques Rudolph will make an appearance against us this summer? When England play against South Africa later this year, it will most probably be the most South Africans taking part in the same game of cricket since isolation.

Third and Fourth Ashes Test - Chalk and Cheese or Liver and Onions

A soggy England provided an entertaining Edgbaston Test. For a moment it seemed as though there might be a result squeezed out of it, but alas, it was not so. After fannying about for a bit, the Aussies were bowled out for 263, but then the English didn't seem to make much of their chances and the 113 lead they had when Australia took to the crease again.

With as many interruptions as you'd expect from English weather, the game was washed out with Australia getting some form back in their second innings, ending the third Test with their scorecard reading 375/5.

This, I believe, was a bit help to Ponting's men who seemed to go "Hmmm... so that's how you bat" and they carried this idea into the fourth Test at Leeds.

I had a dream a few days before the fourth Test where I saw or heard somewhere that England lost the Test, which gave me a funny feeling about this one. Now I know how true that dream was. Australia will most likely win this match and it'll be shorter than any Test match that Bangladesh have played. Ever.

This will no doubt be a huge blow to the Poms. First they lose Kevin Pietersen to a faulty achilles, then Freddie Flintoff's knee starts acting up and he gets dropped. Now, the Poms have lost two of their biggest names and they're down to a bunch of blokes that can't seem to pull up the spirits enough to make the team perform.

There's only one thing that could make it worse now, but I'm not even going to mention it, because I know that I might curse it.

So what happened to England? Why aren't they being allowed to make more than a hundred together? The Aussies score as freely as you would on one of those EA Sports Cricket games set on easy - where it helps you with timing and shot selection, but the Poms are battling to survive.

There was much talk about the Australians not being able to play swing, but that seems to have all but disappeared... either they can play swing, or the Englishmen can't get the ball to swing. However, Onions bowled a beauty this afternoon that thumped Clarke on the toes and stopped him short of his hundred. That ball swung like a pingpong ball and took a wicket. Surely Strauss would have told them to carry on with that.

The Australians are being allowed to think themselves back into the game, and everyone knows that there is very little anyone can do against an Australian team with a strong mental state. Being strong mentally and focussed is exactly what has made them a formiddable team since 1897.

Since they lost their main players pretty much at the same time, Australia have struggled a bit to get back to their winning ways. But now that England have shown that they aren't capable of putting at least one innings together at Leeds, the Australians have been allowed to get not only their feet, but their torsos in the door too. England went into the match with a 1-0 advantage after the first three Tests:

- one draw that not even Houdini himself could pull out of a hat
- a win from some really good bowling and a stunning knock from Strauss
- a draw that was brought on by the rain, but the Australians looked very much in while batting out their second innings.

I know I picked the Poms to win the Ashes, but I must say that they have hardly impressed me so far, and they're leaving it all to do in the last match. Their batting has been inconsistent and the bowling as threatening as a wet sponge fight. Australia have now managed to put a couple of fifties together and some good bowling spells as well.

If England want to get their oily fish&chips fingers on the little Ashes urn, then the Barmy Army will have to starting hurling rocks at Ponting and not just insults.